


the people of forever.

by 1roomdisco



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Domestic Fluff, Future Fic, JB is a backup dancer and JR is JR of GOT5 lmao, JB yells and curses too much, M/M, bit of sekshi scene, jackson is great with kiddo, kid!youngjae, migrated fic from the other site, more on the author's note, youngjae is from the future aka their son
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-19
Updated: 2017-03-19
Packaged: 2018-10-07 12:56:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10360983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1roomdisco/pseuds/1roomdisco
Summary: future!AU + kid!fic, in which jinyoung is a member of famous boy group and jaebum is the backup dancer. (youngjae? youngjae is their son, coming from the future.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> my piece for [](http://def-pepi.livejournal.com/profile)[def_pepi](http://def-pepi.livejournal.com/) exchange back in may 2015, almost two years ago. thanks to [](http://littlemelonblue.livejournal.com/profile)[littlemelonblue](http://littlemelonblue.livejournal.com/) and their prompt. mention of MPREG. fl00f galore.  
>   
> 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

the last time jinyoung had felt like this, like there’s a harmless but untamed little monster inside of him that wouldn’t go away no matter how often he tried to tell it to _please calm down, please, he will never look at me like i look at him,_ he was only fifteen—obsessed with the thought of being korean haruki murakami, writing poetic rambling about that one boy in his class who radiated like the sun, always blinding him with his crooked, cheeky smile and giving jinyoung a pleasant shiver whenever he ran his longlonglong fingers through his messy, sweaty hair at gym class and whispering jinyoung’s name with his cracked voice while they were all struggling with english quiz because he’s still confused about the proper use of _your_ versus _you’re._

jinyoung is nineteen now, far from writing anything but signing cd’s for nice girls and mature women who adore his face, his voice, his personality, and his group of four other boys singing about love, life, and everything in between. becoming an idol was never in jinyoung’s dream, he was just coming home from an english course when a forty-something man offered him a card with ‘JYP entertainment’ written in bold letters as he waited for the bus. the nicely dressed man said he came to busan to visit a relative, but you’re a very attractive young man, just in case you might be interested to build a career as an idol. and then he asked if jinyoung ever heard of ‘park jinyoung’ and jinyoung has always been a charming kid, so he answered, yes, of course i’ve heard of ‘park jinyoung’, that’s my name, sir. when the man laughed out loud at that, jinyoung thought he had a nice laugh. the man explained that the entertainment agency’s president name is park jinyoung, a.k.a JYP, see, that singer from the 90’s, your mom is probably a fan, so please come take a look around our headquarter at gangnam anytime you want, i’ll be expecting you!

(his mom, as it turned out, was a fan of seo taiji, but she gave her permission for him to come to gangnam to check out what’s the fuss about this ‘idol business’ and jinyoung went there with his two older sisters that weekend, and they both screamed when they caught a glimpse of wooyoung and chansung from boy group 2PM.)

so jinyoung is nineteen, he’s an idol in a boy group called GOT5, and after two agonizing years of training in singing, dancing, acting, MC-ing, developing his personal talents, and winning rookie of the year award, the harmless but untamed little monster inside of him has awoken again.

 

 

 

 

**_1_ **

“are you alright?”

jinyoung keeps the sour face he’s been half-faking ever since they had lunch break today. GOT5 is going to have a comeback that is expected to be fantastic ever since they won rookie of the year award, and everyone is giving their a hundred percent, including jinyoung who can’t really master the swivel of hips he’s supposed to do during the chorus.

(which isn’t difficult to master at all, if jinyoung is being honest. he might be half-assing the dance in order to prove a very important suspicion.)

“what, hyung?” he mumbles his answer as he fiddles with the loose shoelace of his left converse. his half-faked bad mood is shooing everyone away; bambam is sprawled on top of yugyeom on the other side of the practice room, mark gave him a bottle of vitamin water before keeping his distance, and jackson, their leader, doesn’t dare to approach him when he’s in one of his infamous jr.’s blues that is acknowledged even among the fans.

jr., or junior, is jinyoung’s stage name, due to having the same name as the president of JYP entertainment, and he’s in charge of vocal, some rap, balancing the carefree and playful image of the group with his gentleness and dandyish appearance, and he’s the ‘observant umma’ to jackson’s ‘crazy appa’. him being sensitive and moody has got nothing to do with his role as the umma of the group because he’s always been sensitive and moody, like now, even though this one time he’s kind of faking it.

“nothing.” jaebum shakes his head. he takes off his snapback and his black hair is all damp and dull but jinyoung still wants to touch it anyway, like he always wanted (but never did) to touch his classmate’s sweaty, gym class hair.

jaebum squats in front of him, scrutinizing but not judging him despite jinyoung’s refusal to talk to anyone after lunch break eight hours ago. the older man opens his mouth, frowns, and sighs as he reaches out to tie jinyoung’s shoelace. his fingers aren’t that long, but the green veins coursing through the back of his hands and the bones of his wrists are giving jinyoung a pleasant shiver anyway.

“do you want to get fresh air? where’s your jacket?” jaebum asks as he circles his hands around jinyoung’s left ankle.

“why?” jinyoung pretends to be dumbfounded when jaebum gets to his feet. his suspicion is nearly proven to be true, or, at least he sure hopes so.

“because we’re going to get fresh air.” jaebum puts on his snapback again before he offers his open palms and jinyoung grits his teeth to prevent himself from smiling like a fool in love. their hands fit like a pair of gloves. he lets jaebum pull him up and he, deliberately, avoids everyone’s eyes when jaebum asks jackson to give them ten minutes outside.

jackson allows the ten minutes, because even though he’s younger than jaebum, he’s GOT5’s leader and he’s responsible for the members. he brings jinyoung his jacket, and jinyoung feels bad for acting moody for his own selfish reason, but he swears he’s not going to make it a habit once his suspicion that jaebum _can sense_ the slightest change of his mood and is always trying his best to make him feel better is proven true.

they go to the rooftop. jinyoung takes a deep, shuddering breath when the early march cold wind hits his face. jaebum chuckles and pulls him closer by his nape, squeezing it with a smile.

“better?” he asks, maneuvering them to sit at the wooden bench.

jinyoung scoffs, scrunching his nose the way jaebum seems to be fond of, if his softened eyes are any indications as he picks out a pack of camel from the inner pocket of his coat.

“do you mind?” jaebum knows that jinyoung never minds whenever jaebum smokes anywhere near him, but he asks all the time. jinyoung finds that little fact admirable, although the smoking bit is not. jaebum is only twenty five years old, he should live forever, jinyoung thinks.

“go ahead, hyung,” jinyoung takes the cheap 7-11 lighter and cups a hand to block the wind. jaebum’s eyelashes aren’t that long, and his forehead is kinda wide upon thisclose, but jinyoung stares and stares some more until the visor of jaebum’s snapback is hitting the tip of his nose.

“shit, sorry.” jaebum grimaces and puts the cigarette in between his lips and jinyoung pretends to be irritated when jaebum leans forward to inspect his nose. “you okay?”

“‘m fine.” jinyoung shoves jaebum’s shoulders and then they burst out laughing; jaebum inhaling his daily dose of nicotine and jinyoung feeling warmer just looking at him.

“are you excited for your comeback? the title track is good.” jaebum says after a couple of heart beats. the orangey-reddish light from the tip of jaebum’s cigarette is more beautiful than the city lights, jinyoung thinks. he also loves the way jaebum holds his cigarette with his thumb and forefinger. very classic. and manly. well.

“just good?” jinyoung crosses his arms, swallowing a lump when jaebum sucks the cigarette deeply, cheeks hollowing, bones sharp and statuesque.

“like, winning music shows _good,_ junior, don’t worry.” jaebum glances at him and jinyoung doesn’t care if either his giddy smile or his moony eyes are giving out his secret because he values jaebum’s opinion about GOT5. jaebum is not yet a choreographer, he’s a longtime b-boy belongs to a street crew. he also works at a dance company providing for backup dancers. it’s safe to say that he’s JYP-hyung favorite, most likely thanks to his versatility in dancing and, most surprisingly, polished singing voice. rumor has it jaebum was offered a place within 2PM but he had refused politely because he said idol life didn’t suit him. still, he’s quite famous among JYP stan out there; they recognize him on the street, they stop him to take photos, they send him birthday gifts with adorable encouraging messages, even the overseas fans are starting to want to know more about him since he’s been JYP entertainment boy groups and girl groups’ backup dancer for years and his instagram is filled with handsome selcas.

jinyoung though, he wasn’t really paying attention to jaebum the first time they met for GOT5’s debut stage preparation. he was too nervous and excited he got selected to become a member of JYP entertainment’s newest boy group after the success of 2PM. jaebum himself, in jinyoung’s opinion, wasn’t the type who would catch your eyes the second you saw him, unlike mark with his ethereal face and canine smile, for example. jaebum was not exactly quiet or talkative, jinyoung remembered, he was just _there,_ listening to main choreographer-hyung. it took him a couple of practices to actually talk to jaebum, and it began with such an unflattering event because he crushed jaebum’s pack of camel on the asphalt as he stepped out to get some fresh air. jaebum who was in the middle of bending down to pick it up had frowned and jinyoung had apologized, and then jaebum just shrugged and threw the unopened pack to the trash can. he smiled at jinyoung, told him not to worry, and jinyoung stuttered that he would buy him a new one. jaebum laughed, you’re underage, he said, and when jinyoung blushed, he asked, somehow with a gentler tone, _jinyoung, right? you okay?_ —and at jinyoung’s apparent confusion he shook his head and apologized, never mind, sorry, and jinyoung only understood what the heck was jaebum talking about hours later when he was on the verge of sleeping; he wasn’t feeling the peachiest that day, he was so, so, _so_ tired he had wanted to cry that’s why he got out to get some fresh air.

of course jinyoung started to pay attention to jaebum after that.

“do you want to have cheese ramyun with me later?” jaebum nudges jinyoung’s shoulders with his when their ten minutes is up.

jinyoung bats his eyelashes. now that his suspicion is confirmed, his half-faked bad mood is gone. “only if it’s your treat, jaebum-hyung.”

jaebum snorts and pinches jinyoung’s chin with his cigarette smoke fingers. “you’re lucky you’re my favorite, park jinyoung.”

 

▼

 

from: jb-hyung ♥  
did u liek it

to: jb-hyung ♥  
of coursee ^^ your mixtapes are the best, jb-hyungie ~

from: jb-hyung ♥  
im glad  
hows the photoshoot

to: jb-hyung ♥  
me too!  
it’s tiring, but we’re wrapping it up. how’s your day, hyung?

from: jb-hyung ♥  
went to see a movie  
its great youd like it  
‘the imitation game’

to: jb-hyung ♥  
oh i know that one! that sherlock guy and keira knightley, right?  
awww i was just going to ask you to see it with me T__T

from: jb-hyung ♥  
yeah  
lets see it toegther then i dun mind watching it again  
when r u free., ?

to: jb-hyung ♥  
really??  
we’r free tomorrow! let’s have dinner after that, hyung!

from: jb-hyung ♥  
k  
go back to work

to: jb-hyung ♥  
yayy :)  
okay, hyung, bye bye!

 

▼

 

jinyoung likes girls. girls are soft and they have fruity smell and gorgeous hair. the problem is, he’s just never been in love with one.

when he was ten, he had his first girlfriend. he kissed the prettiest girl in school when he was thirteen, and he was hailed as the prom king because of that. his second girlfriend was a rather tomboy girl from an all girls high school and they lasted for five months after they lost their virginities to each other when they both were seventeen. he gave them flowers and cupcakes, and that one time after scraping his saving, cute couple shoes and t-shirts, but he never loved any of them.

he had loved his classmate, _a_ boy, when he was fifteen and now he’s in love with im jaebum, who isn’t a member of GOT5, which means he just told the whole world that i would date jaebum-hyung if i were a girl.

“oh? ‘jaebum-hyung’? who’s that, junior-sshi?” the MC is a girl group sunbaenim with pretty eyesmile. teasing the crowd of m! countdown she asks some more, “is he a new member of GOT5 we’re not aware of?”

the screaming from the crowd is buying jinyoung time to make up a logical explanation.

“no no no,” he gives the whole studio his trademarked jr.’s crow’s feet smile, “he’s one of our backup dancers hyung. he’s very nice. i picked him out of habit, i guess. sorry, jackson.”

jackson, the rising star of variety show, narrows his eyes at jinyoung and protests, “how dare you! i picked you! we’re happily married...”

“yeah, jr.-hyung! i thought we can only pick our members,” yugyeom, their giant maknae who picked jackson, butts in. “i change my choice, minah-sshi! if i were a girl, i want to date jaebum-hyung, too.” ah, right. yugyeom is also promoting his migratory bird image nowadays. the kid has such strong variety sense to make a simple question and answer time interesting.

“yah!” jackson stands up with a disbelieving look on his face. the crowd and the MC laugh, and jinyoung continues,

“it’s not my fault none of you treat me right.” he pouts to the crowd, milking their instantaneous cooing like air. it’s an unfair answer, sure, because jinyoung only needs jaebum to treat him right, but he’s just delivering what people want to hear, so.

“sorry, umma~” bambam is on him in an instant, nuzzling his neck and hugging him. yugyeom is the heaviest but his hug is always welcomed, and mark is clinging to his legs. jinyoung makes an eye contact with jackson, his so-called husband, and jackson makes kissy lips and the crowd goes wild while bambam goes ewww when jinyoung tilts his head for a kiss. jackson reciprocates, but then he chickens out first, looks away first with a silly face, claiming that he will be chivalrous from now on for jinyoung, his wife.

 

▼

 

GOT5 wins an all-kill on their second week promoting ‘magnetic girl’, another win on music band the following week, and JYP-hyung throws them a party after they’re done with this comeback. he announces that he’s giving them three months vacation, but if any of them are getting called to audition for drama, variety show, talk show, radio show, MC-ing, etc etc, they have to take it. GOT5 might be popular enough, but they need to get on national television as often as they can.

the party is held at a japanese restaurant where JYP-hyung reserves a VIP room with a karaoke machine and everyone is having a good time. especially jinyoung, because jaebum (along with the rest of backup dancer hyungs) is here with him, sipping on sake and eating sushi and is pressed up thigh to thigh with him on the tatami. he misses jaebum a lot. GOT5 was recording an MTV variety show during ‘magnetic girl’ promotion, and with other promotion activities jinyoung barely had the time to have his phone. ‘magnetic girl’ only used backup dancers on fridays, so really, it had felt like a thousand years ago the last time jinyoung could sit next to jaebum like this.

even though jaebum seems quieter than ever tonight.

“are you alright, jaebum-hyung?” jinyoung asks with a low voice, not wanting to disturb the quiet mood jaebum is having. jaebum doesn’t look like the type who appreciates coddling, not from anyone, let alone from a boy six years younger than him.

“hm? oh, yeah. this is the best japanese restaurant ever.” jaebum smiles but it’s just in passing. jinyoung doesn’t like it.

“aren’t you going to sing something?” jinyoung picks a neutral topic to open their conversation. “you like red velvet’s new single, right? that ice cream cake song.”

“hmm, yeah, well. they’re not bad. seulgi is really pretty in the flesh. saw her last week.” jinyoung is more bothered by how jaebum only answers him in passing rather than the fact that jaebum just said that seulgi from red velvet is really pretty.

“i like irene,” jinyoung chimes in half-heartedly, and jaebum doesn’t comment on that.

it’s amazing how fast jinyoung goes from excited to miserable in a matter of minutes. he wants to cry.

“i’ve been thinking,” jaebum clears his throat, like he’s preparing himself for what’s next. jinyoung decides to do the same. he sits up straighter and fists his hands and—

“do you want to be mine, jinyoung-ah?”

—and he’s glad he did. because _that_ came out of nowhere.

“hyung, what are you talking about?” jinyoung bites his bottom lip, glancing around the room for potential random listeners. they’re sitting in a corner, and everyone is busy with their foods and conversations and dancing to crayon pop’s ‘bar bar bar’.

“no. no, don’t do that, jinyoung-ah. tell me. do you want to be mine?” jaebum shakes his head. he looks _sad_ when he says, “because i read an article on naver about you wanting to date ‘jaebum-hyung’ if you were a girl. some fans mentioned me on twitter about it too, giving me links to the video on youtube.”

jinyoung is not stupid. he got over his first love when he was fifteen because they went to different high schools and he hadn’t wanted to do anything with him but to write a book about his crooked, cheeky smile. maybe a kiss or two, and that’s it. but he’s nineteen now, he wants everything from jaebum; he wants to kiss jaebum’s cigarette smoke lips, wants jaebum to fuck him nice and slow then hard and fast, and he wants to choke on jaebum’s cock, letting him come on his face and in his ass. jinyoung _was_ getting it all, one thing at a time, like jaebum’s attention and private smile and his hand on his nape and jaebum making him mixtapes and paying for their meals and movie tickets and jaebum greeting him good morning and good night, sleep tight, via line and its appropriate stickers.

he _was_ getting it all, but he’s about to lose them all right now.

it’s ridiculous. did jinyoung read jaebum wrong? maybe it would be easier if jaebum wasn’t giving him those hopeful, yellow-green light signals after all this time only to be back to red because of, what, jinyoung accidentally revealing an insignificant part of his whole, vast feeling on a music show?

why can’t he be in love with jaebum a while longer (maybe forever)?

but who is jinyoung kidding?

“i know i can’t.” jinyoung is blinking back tears. it’s unfortunate that they’re too stubborn. if jaebum notices that jinyoung is wiping the corners of his eyes with the hem of his sponsored t-shirt, he quietly, stupidly, keeps it to himself. jinyoung needs jaebum to treat him right, he needs jaebum to apologize for confronting him about his feeling in the middle of a company party, not _not_ acknowledging him like they weren’t practically acting like they’re more than just friends up until last week.

“you know that’s right.” jaebum nods, sounding so distant from where they’re pressed together thigh to thigh in a japanese restaurant’s VIP room. “let’s stop whatever this is.”

jinyoung needs a moment before he can answer a barely audible _yes, hyung_ and even then he’s not sure if jaebum is still listening to him.

 

 

 

 

_**2** _

it’s jaebum’s choice to live alone. no unnecessary hassle of splitting the bills and the rent or arguing whose turn it is to clean the bathroom. he’s made enough to get his own shitty place at some rooftop that is the exact copy of every single korean drama rooftop ‘studio apartment’ with its green, outdoor ground and lots of communal clothing lines for other tenants to use (they never do, thankfully). don’t forget the spacious wooden bench for hanging out with friends, and you get the whole picture.

except for today.

because there’s a little kid sitting cross-legged on it, wearing thin clothing for such chilly early april weather, when jaebum gets home from buying milk and cereal.

the little kid looks up from something he’s holding on his little hands and he’s got squishy cheeks. his eyes are fox-like, slanted, and his button nose is cute. they’re having a staring match, jaebum realizes, as the little kid tilts his head to the side with the usual innocent, curious look on his face. he’s got cute, pouty lips. he’s scrunching his nose. he’s smiling like he can’t believe what he sees (is it jaebum’s questionable flip flops and socks?). he’s greeting jaebum in english,

_“hello! good afternoon, my name is youngjae. i’m your son.”_

hm, wow, his english has no accen—

wait. what?

jaebum’s english is so so. he’s on a level where he can help a lost tourist, sure, and he understands that the little kid just said that he’s jaebum’s _son,_ but he doesn’t understand whether this little kid walking barefoot to him with a nostalgic, longing smile is trying to fuck with him or what. is this a fucking prank? for what occasion? his birthday was in january. april fool's was a couple of days ago. heh. that’s it. it’s a late april fool's prank from his b-boying crew. yeah, there’s no other logical explanation for this. poor kid, jaebum thinks as he looks down at the little creature only coming up to his waist, at least his crew should’ve dressed him properly, for god’s sake!

_“dad? i’m hungry.”_

jaebum snorts. the kid’s a good actor, huh? seriously, his english and the way he’s not even afraid of stranger by the name of im jaebum are flawless. even the way he calls jaebum _‘dad’_ sound so effortless on his tongue, so natural.

“yeah yeah,” jaebum pinches the little ki—what’s his name again? youngjae?—he pinches youngjae’s chin gently before unlocking the front door. he ushers youngjae in, determined to play along with his crew’s prank just to spite them. besides, he doesn’t mind a company on this beautiful sunny day, albeit one he would’ve never expected to meet at all.

“are you cold?” he asks youngjae once the kid is settling down on jaebum’s dining slash multi function table. he doesn’t get an answer right away, and after he puts the cereal in the mini fridge, he remembers that he was speaking in korean.

“you really don’t understand korean, huh?” jaebum smiles as he pours a glass of milk for youngjae. “what did noyoung-hyung pay you with? don’t worry, i’m going to fucking kill him.” he mutters the last part and sits next to youngjae who ignores his korean babbling. there’s a photograph on his table. youngjae’s, probably.

_“sorry, youngjae-yah. are you cold?”_ jaebum asks again, pushing the glass closer to the photograph. there are three people in it. the setting looks familiar, though? that ugly, red painted door looks like his ugly front door. the man holding the little kid on his arms looks like... um. jinyoung? that haircut and that dimpled smil—hey, is that his favorite acne studio checkered shirt jinyoung is wearing in the photo?

jaebum squints.

fuck. it _is_ his favorite acne studio checkered shirt jinyoung is wearing in the photo.

that’s _him_ grinning in the photo with an arm around jinyoung’s waist and the little kid on jinyoung’s arms is _youngjae,_ his button nose is scrunched up to the camera cutely.

fuck.

_fuck._

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.

_“dad, please don’t curse. mom doesn’t like it when you curse.”_

jaebum gapes, and then he closes his mouth. what the hell? how come youngjae can understand him cursing out loud in korean? he stares at youngjae who is drinking the milk calmly in horror, his heartbeats deafening him. jaebum’s brain is whirring, putting two and two together; the photograph, the way youngjae calls him _‘dad’,_ youngjae commenting nonchalantly about his cursing habit while he doesn’t even understand simple korean is surely the product of everyday occurrence because what did he say? _‘mom’_ doesn’t like it when jaebum ( _dad_ ) curse?!

“you—!”

_“may i have the cereal? mom says cereal is only for breakfast, and he will be angry if he knows. but i’m really hungry, dad.”_

_“mom?!”_

youngjae nods. he’s judging jaebum’s outburst, jaebum knows. he’s seen someone making that kind of incredulous face somewher—

fuuuuuuuuuuck.

jaebum snatches the photograph and points at jinyoung and asks, _“mom?”_ and youngjae nods again. jaebum points at himself and yells, _“DAD?!”_ and youngjae pouts, clearly upset he’s getting yelled, but he nods anyway, scooting further away from jaebum tensed body language.

jaebum’s abrupt scream is making youngjae flinch, but he doesn’t have the time to feel bad as he runs to the front door, forgetting his flip flops and kicking a plastic bucket while screaming and cursing at noyoung-hyung to come out and fight me you son of a bitch! you win, okay? stop with the fucking joke, hyung, I’M NOT FUCKING LAUGHING!!!

the cold wind blows. the afternoon sun shines. it’s saturday, and jaebum’s rage is coming in a wave of hot white flash. before he can stop himself he’s already breaking a window. his left knuckles are bleeding, and the pain comes just a little too late as jaebum sends his blurred eyes to the blueblueblue sky.

taking a continuous deep breath, jaebum wills the rush of blood to the head to slow down together with his heart beats. when his whole body is back to its normal setting, he rolls his shoulders, stands taller, and takes out his phone from the pocket of his jeans to dial jinyoung’s deleted number that he knows by heart.

 

▼

 

if youngjae wasn’t scared of him before his stupid temper got the best of him, he is _now_ as he stirs the froot loops he wanted until they’re soggy and bloated.

“i’m your dad, right? can i tell you not to play with your food?” jaebum mumbles, not feeling sarcastic at all, from across the table with a bowl of his own. his bandaged left hand stings. youngjae doesn’t look up. jaebum sighs.

_“i’m sorry.”_

upon hearing the apology in english, youngjae juts his bottom lip. fuck. is he going to cry? he looks like he’s going to cry any second now.

_“please don’t cry.”_ jaebum reaches out to... _what,_ maybe patting youngjae’s head or squeezing his hunched shoulders, but youngjae huffs and glares at his arm, turning around so his back is to jaebum.

“god.” jaebum sighs again, rubbing his temple. defeated. probably saddened. because. because, you know, if it’s like this, will he be a good dad later on? his experience with kids is so fucking limited, for he’s an only child in his family. none of his friends have kids yet. wait. what’s his opinion of kids in general? they’re cute, that’s for sure, they’re loud, they still smell like baby powder. those kids on variety shows seem smart and fun to be around. _youngjae_ seems smart, but is he fun?

“jaebum-hyung? it’s me.” jaebum snaps out of his daymare. jinyoung is here. “open the door...?” he damn nearly breaks his neck as he runs to open the door, revealing jinyoung covered from head to toe due to his idol status.

it’s been awhile. jaebum is struggling to keep his expression on check. jinyoung looks _gorgeous_ in that grey beanie and red, thin scarf. his full lips and cheeks are pink from the weather, and forever being a considerate human being, he brings a plastic bag full of beer and snacks.

“hi.” jinyoung’s smile is shy.

“hey.” jaebum wants to kiss him.

“um, it’s cold?” jinyoung scrunches his nose, and yeah. _yeah,_ jaebum thinks, relieved (?) yet somehow still horrified, _definitely the mother of my son._

“sorry, come on in.” he takes the plastic bag from jinyoung’s hand, making sure the sleeve of his sweatshirt is hiding his injury. “there’s someone who wants to meet you.”

“oh?” jinyoung is toeing off his converse. he hasn’t seen youngjae sitting on his knees, craning his neck to their direction with the same nostalgic, longing smile that was once intended for jaebum. now the smile is solely for jinyoung, jaebum knows.

“oh!” jinyoung blinks when he finally sees youngjae standing up noisily. “annyeong~ who are you?” jinyoung smiles and glances at jaebum who nods at him to go on. “i’m jinyoung. you can call me hyung.”

jaebum snorts. “he doesn’t speak korean,” he says, “talk to him in english.”

“omo.” jinyoung giggles. he sits in front of youngjae and he takes youngjae’s hand for a cute handshake. _“hi! my name is jinyoung. who are you?”_ jinyoung loves to sharpen up his english conversation skill with jackson and mark because he told jaebum that he wants to be able to communicate with GOT5’s overseas fans. jinyoung is also good with kids, jaebum has seen him interacting with lots of kids from fancams and fantaken photos on the internet. he’ll handle youngjae just fine.

_“it’s me, mom, youngjae.”_

there you go.

gasping, jinyoung hits his right knee on the underside of the dining table. he turns to jaebum for explanation, his eyes are wide.

jaebum puts the plastic bag on the floor and nods to the photograph placed in the middle of the table. he leans back to the wall as he watches jinyoung frown and plead at him to explain.

“look at the date,” jaebum says, “bottom right corner.”

“may first?” jinyoung reads it, then, _“2015?_ but it’s april fourth today!”

“exactly.” jaebum doesn’t know why he’s whispering, but he does, and jinyoung pales when he _really_ looks at youngjae, their son.

maybe it’s the unexpected disbelief blatantly painted on jinyoung’s face, maybe it’s jaebum’s stupid temper from before—because not a second later youngjae is bawling his heart out, sobbing pitifully with big, fat tears rolling down his squishy cheeks, clearly upset that his last hope of parental warmth is doubting him. jaebum doesn’t know what to do. he’s not ready to get rejected again. but it hurts knowing that he’s afraid of his son’s rejection because of what he did.

_“i’m sorry! i’m sooooo so so sorry. come here, youngjae-yah.”_ jinyoung hushes youngjae with an encouraging smile. he gestures for the little boy to jump to his arms. youngjae does, hugging jinyoung’s neck so tight until jinyoung falls to lie on his back. jinyoung laughs, patting youngjae’s butt and stroking youngjae’s back, hugging him just as tightly.

“omo you’re too cold! jaebum-hyung, give us a blanket, quick!”

jaebum nearly breaks his neck again as he stumbles over the plastic bag, running to his room to get a blanket. he picks the thickest one, and jinyoung tugs him down after he’s done cocooning youngjae with it.

what? he mouths at jinyoung, whose glare is a carbon copy of youngjae’s. or is it the other way around?

what?? jaebum tries again, and jinyoung grabs his hand, placing it on top of his on youngjae’s blanketed back. oh, jaebum swallows down bitter saliva as he stiffly mimics jinyoung’s gentle stroking, okay, i can do that.

“good,” jinyoung whispers, “now lie down, hyung. sing to him.”

“what? why?” jaebum pulls his hand away from youngjae’s back and panics when youngjae whines.

“see?” jinyoung’s glare is fiercer and jaebum grimaces. “he needs you. come on!”

jaebum is going crazy. it’s not the right time to feel flattered by such unbeknownst fact.

“what should i sing to him?” he asks jinyoung as he lies down on his side, one hand propping up his head while the other is massaging youngjae’s nape. he feels a new urgency to make shit right as he waits for jinyoung to pick a song to sing. youngjae _needs_ him. that’s. that’s just super mind-blowing, okay!

“ah,” jinyoung snaps his fingers, “the song from your last mixtape, hyung.” he continues with a pleasant hum. “the title... what is it?”

jaebum replays jinyoung’s brief humming in his head. _“‘no one like you’?”_

jinyoung nods frantically, and it’s jaebum’s cue to clear his throat.  
  
_“i like your eyes_  
_i like your nose_  
_i like your mouth, your ears, your toes_

_i like your face_  
_it’s really you_  
_i like the things you say and do...”_

youngjae sniffs. he turns his head to face jaebum with a pouty smile and mucus smeared all over his nose and mouth. jaebum laughs, gently wiping off the mucus with his bare hand and then wiping his hand clean on his t-shirt. jinyoung is biting his bottom lip, probably trying not to cry himself, knowing his melancholic tendency.  
  
_“there’s not a single soul_  
_who sees the skies_  
_the way you see them through your eyes_

_and aren’t you glad_  
_you should be glad_  
_there’s no one, no one_  
_exactly like you...”_

youngjae reaches out his tiny palm to touch jaebum’s face, tenderly, like he’s trying to remember.

_“i’m sorry, dad.”_ youngjae sighs, and he sounds just like jaebum when he does so.

_“it’s okay.”_ jaebum kisses youngjae’s cold knuckles and holds them in his much bigger hand to warm him up.

_“i love you.”_ youngjae declares, closing his eyes, looking contented lying down in jinyoung’s arms, who is of course crying quietly.

jaebum is going crazy because he’s whispering i love you back to his future son while biting his tongue so he won’t say the same thing to jinyoung, his another people of forever.

 

▼

 

im youngjae is five years old, born in seoul on september 17th, 2018. his current address is 333 fernleigh street, auckland. his dad is im jaebum who makes film, not movie, and his mom is park jinyoung who writes _besseller_ books. they live in a big, two story house with a shiba dog named tata and a russian blue cat named nini. he’s supposed to have his piano lesson with miss gallagher every saturday, but here he is.

sleeping in jaebum’s lumpy bed, dressed in brand new panda printed pajama that the three of them had gone to buy at the nearest department store along with other stuffs.

they had spaghetti meatball for dinner, and both jaebum and jinyoung are full from it. they’re sitting outside on the wooden bench, jaebum remembering that he hasn’t had his first cigarette for the day but decides not to. if their calculation is right, he’s going to have to take care of youngjae until the first of may, next month, which means that he has to try to cease his smoking for the time being.

jaebum sighs.

“you’ve been doing that a lot, jaebum-hyung.” jinyoung’s words are tentative, like he’s not sure if he’s allowed to have a decent conversation with jaebum now that they don’t have their son between them as a peace mascot. at least his trademarked crow feet smile reaches his eyes, jaebum thinks, because why wouldn’t it be? youngjae is polite, he’s not that loud and his crisp laugh is contagious. he’s the best kid any parents could’ve asked for, including them, despite the shock that still haunts them like a shadow.

jaebum smiles. “what? sighing?”

“uh-huh. tired?”

“nah,” jaebum shakes his head. “overwhelmed, i guess. how about you? are you alright?”

“i’m fine,” jinyoung nods. “i’m just trying not to get ahead of myself.”

“why’s that?” jaebum takes a sip of his hite from the can. his second. he didn’t know he needed them.

jinyoung crosses his arms, acting defensive, probably because of what he’s going to say. jaebum swears he’s not going to lose his temper—

“you broke my heart, remember? but apparently we’re going to have youngjae together.”

—yeah, okay, maybe he’s losing his dignity a little.

they both pause for a heart beat.

“jinyoung-ah—”

“i just—”

jaebum grins and jinyoung covers his face with both hands. his shoulders are shaking. he speaks first, his voice is lighter and his face is beautiful underneath the moonlight.

“you’re aware that i’m in love with you, right?” it’s not a question, though. it’s a statement that jaebum can’t deny.

“yeah.” so jaebum doesn’t deny that he’s aware of how jinyoung orbits towards him on dance practices; how the constant notification on his line app is from jinyoung and how he’s actually, perfectly fine with everything; with how he pays for their meals and movie tickets and that one loony time buying a bouquet of fresh flowers for jinyoung—without being affected by the lack of soft angles and pussy from jinyoung’s part.

“i just don’t want to get ahead of myself. three years is a long time, hyung, lots of things can happen. i’m just taking care of my heart, you know? i mean, if you’re still mad at me for falling in love with you _now,_ i understand.” jinyoung blushes. “youngjae is a guarantee that i’ll be yours, so i’m just saying that as for now i’m not going to do anything that you don’t want me to do, jaebum-hyung.”

“who said i’m mad?”

“y-you seemed mad at the last party, so i thought—”

“no, jinyoung-ah, listen,” jaebum takes jinyoung’s cold hands in his, rubbing his thumbs to jinyoung’s inner wrists. they really need to have this talk, huh? misunderstanding is tiring, jaebum’s been there and done that.

“i’m not mad. you didn’t do anything wrong. i don’t see you as another friend, either. in fact, i’ve never wanted to kiss a boy so much before you. i was just—” jaebum’s chuckle is bitter. “i’m a fucking _coward,_ okay? you’re an idol, for fuck’s sake. i can’t risk your career for my own selfish needs.”

“what if i’m just as selfish as you? i want all of you, jaebum-hyung.” jinyoung sniffs, tugging his hands free to cross his arms again, being defensive again. “you should know that everything, from my lips to my heart, is already yours. so i want your cock in my mouth and i want you to fuck me until i forget my name. i want you to only look at me.”

jesus fucking _christ._

misunderstanding is tiring, but nobody said to jaebum that honesty can be this _cruel._ jinyoung is beautiful inside and out, his aesthetic is incomparable and jaebum adores other valuable aspects that create park ‘jr.’ jinyoung whole.

but jaebum is only human.

his eyes dart down to jinyoung’s pink, chapped lips as he confesses, “i do, i only look at you.” and jinyoung laughs, proud like he’s winning some big prize, and then he’s planting an open-mouthed kiss to jaebum’s mouth.

there are _sparks,_ jaebum has to admit. it ignites his senses, pushing him to kiss back with reckless abandon, caging jinyoung’s beautiful face in his hands as he deepens the kiss. jinyoung is letting him invade his space; he goes pliant and follows jaebum’s lead, moaning and clawing at jaebum’s shoulders.

the kiss feels right. jinyoung tastes like tomato sauce and mint chocolate chip ice cream youngjae only shared with him because it’s obvious that youngjae favors his mom better than his awkward dad. jaebum smiles to the kiss, remembering how sulky he was when youngjae yelled _mom don’t share our ice cream with dad!_ he bites jinyoung’s bottom lip and slips a hand into jinyoung’s fancy sweater, palming his hips and stomach.

jinyoung’s breath stutters cutely when jaebum’s thumb grazes his left nipple.

“no?” jaebum grins, mischievous.

“no.” jinyoung confirms, breathless. he slaps jaebum’s hand away from his body. “it’s only 2015.”

“are you saying we have to wait three years?” jaebum shifts closer to haul jinyoung to straddle his lap. jinyoung raises his eyebrows at the sudden intimacy, but he wraps his arms around jaebum’s shoulders anyway. “i thought you said you want me to fuck you until you forget your name.”

jinyoung rolls his eyes, impatient but sexy, and he tells jaebum to be _creative_ in such a challenging, taunting tone jaebum can’t help but to play dirty by sucking a hickey high above the collar of jinyoung’s fancy sweater.

 

 

 

 

_**3** _

youngjae wakes up alone.

mom’s side of the bed is still warm. maybe youngjae can catch him before he goes off to work to kiss him goodbye. or maybe mom is in the bathroom. either way, youngjae is hungry, so he jumps off young dad’s uncomfortable bed (but don’t tell young dad that, okay, hush hush) and opens the bedroom door. the dining/living room is empty except for young dad sprawled like a starfish and snoring like a troll on the rattan mat. ugh, youngjae’s missed mom again!

sometimes mom isn’t home for a looooooong time (that’s when youngjae watches mom on TV, looking _sooooo_ pretty as always)—but mom will video call youngjae and youngjae who’s forgotten that mom isn’t around will be reminded that mom is not here with him and he will puff out his chest to answer mom with a big boy smile. mom said, back home in auckland, if youngjae wanted to have a baby sister he had to learn to be a big brother, one step at a time.

(that means youngjae can’t whine when mom isn’t around. young dad is not that bad to spend time with, even though young dad needs to be reminded again and again that youngjae doesn’t want cucumber in his _keem~bap._ youngjae has to be patient because a big brother is supposed to be patient!).

youngjae goes to the bathroom to pee. he washes his hands and face. it’s nine o’clock in the morning, no wonder he’s hungry.

shuffling to sit closer to young dad’s head, youngjae pinches young dad’s nose to block the flow of oxygen. mom said it’s the only effective way to wake up young dad. youngjae thinks it’s not the right thing to pinch young dad’s nose, but young dad is a really heavy sleeper! youngjae tried to jump on him and he didn’t even wake up! once, mom helped young dad to sit up and shook him violently but still he didn’t wake up!

“grooo _hmph!”_ young dad splutters after a few second.

“i’m sorry i’m sorry!” youngjae apologizes with simple korean words he learns from mom. he jumps on top of young dad’s chest and peppering kisses all over young dad’s handsome face. “wake up, appa, wake up~” mom said to do _aegyo_ as soon as young dad is blinking himself awake, because then young dad would forget his anger and he would do whatever youngjae want.

young dad, who was frowning and grumbling, goes soft like marshmallow as soon as he sees youngjae’s new version of _mehrong_ and he ruffles youngjae’s hair as he sits up.

“good morning, youngjae-yah.” he squishes youngjae’s cheeks gently.

“good morning, appa.” youngjae bows his head. _“what’s for breakfast?”_

“breakfast? what time is it.” young dad squints to his phone and rubs his face roughly, sighing. everything young dad does is rough, youngjae thinks, from his cursing habit to his sudden, exploding temper thanks to a football match on TV. even the way he eats and sleeps are rough. but young dad protects mom who’s busy holding youngjae as they ride the crowded subway and he’s quick to apologize when he and mom have an argument. in conclusion, young dad is very different from mom because mom’s hands are soft and they smell like the bakery. mom also helps youngjae picking out his clothes for the day and he brushes youngjae’s hair. mom loves to take youngjae’s photos with his phone, using a particularly weird one of youngjae drawing a house as a wallpaper.

“breakfast, huh.” young dad moves to stand up and he brings youngjae with him. “super k?”

“okay.” youngjae clings to young dad’s wiiide shoulders and decides that he wants a piggyback. _“piggyback, daddy, please.”_

_“what?”_ young dad asks as he takes out a bowl from the cabinet.

“nothing.” youngjae changes his mind, scrunching his nose because he shouldn’t have wanted a piggyback in the first place. young dad must be having a hard time preparing youngjae’s breakfast while holding youngjae in his arms.

_“no, please, what did you want just now, youngjae-yah?”_ young dad swings youngjae’s tiny body so youngjae is sitting on top of the kitchen counter. _“please tell me, it’s okay.”_ see, not only that young dad is awkward but he’s also so weird. more often than not, he acts as if he’s afraid of youngjae. why, youngjae has no idea. but youngjae is sure he’s not scary... youngjae is _kyeopta!_

youngjae grins. he throws his arms and kicks his little feet and shouts cutely, “orange juice, juseyo~~~”

young dad, thankfully, laughs. “you weren’t asking for orange juice, were you? you brat.” he’s back to complicated korean before he pinches youngjae’s chin. _“orange juice it is. you can have oreo after breakfast. dad won’t tell mom.”_

_“really?!”_ youngjae squeals in delight. he loves oreo! but mom is usually so meany about youngjae eating too much sugar after breakfast!

_“only if you share.”_

_“of course, daddy!”_

 

▼

 

in auckland, dad drives a big, black car everywhere. in seoul, they take the subway or the bus.

youngjae gets tired easily because he’s not used to walk the long distance from one place to another, and it’s mom who will take him to his arms while young dad brings their stuffs. but youngjae makes sure to tell mom and young dad that he likes seoul. the colors are more vivid here.

mom is a singer in seoul. he’s famous among girls. they want to shake his bakery scented hands and pose together for a photo. some of them recognize young dad, too, and they also want to take photos with young dad. they give youngjae lots of candies and chocolates when young dad lies to them that youngjae is his nephew. young dad tells them not to take youngjae’s photos because he says youngjae’s parents don’t want any exposure and they all comply with their serious but pretty faces (mom’s still the prettiest) and then one of them asks a question and young dad answers awkwardly no, _i’m not on a date with jr., ha ha ha!_

_“are you okay?”_ young dad whispers once the hoard of girls 3.0 of the day is gone. _“did they hurt you?”_

youngjae knows this routine; mom or young dad will ask whether he’s okay or not after people touching him. youngjae doesn’t think that’s very nice of mom and young dad, because everyone is so kind to youngjae!

“no, appa.” youngjae answers in korean, watching mom sending off his fans with a wave.

_“good. now which ride do you want to try?”_

youngjae blows out his cheeks to think. lotte indoor amusement park is huuu~ge, but it’s weird because the rides are _inside_ a huge room. youngjae likes outdoor amusement park more. he wants to see the blue sky.

_“viking.”_

_“viking? are you sure?”_

_“we rode it in auckland before, dad.”_

there’s a slight crestfallen look on young dad’s expression after he heard what youngjae just said. oh, no! what did youngjae do?

“appa?” youngjae juts out his bottom lip, clinging to young dad’s chest. “are you okay?”

usually, when young dad smiles, his eyes disappear into thin slits. but not this time, even though he’s smiling. oh, no! nooooooo what did youngjae do? nooooo young dad can’t look sad no no no!

_“do you want mom, dad?”_ youngjae tip toes to touch young dad’s sharp-boned cheeks. young dad laughs at that and leans down to hug him instead, humming, stroking youngjae’s back, inhaling youngjae’s baby powder scent.

“you’re really mine, right?” young dad whispers to nothing in particular. he’s using his complicated korean. “you’ll be there, right? tell me all of this is not a fucking sick joke because i don’t want you to go, youngjae-yah.”

oh, young dad is saying his name? but youngjae doesn’t understand the rest...

_“hi baby, what’s going on here?”_ mom comes back with a smile that’s soon falling when he notices young dad’s unusual display of public affection. young dad holds youngjae in public, yes that’s true, but never this desperate, youngjae thinks as he wraps his tiny arms around young dad’s neck.

“jaebum-hyung?”

“i’m okay, i’m okay.”

“no you’re not.”

mom sits next to young dad on the red bench and young dad hides his face on the crook of mom’s neck, away from youngjae’s confused eyes. mom is shushing young dad, his bakery scented hands are gentle on young dad’s head. youngjae frowns when he feels wetness seeping through his pororo sweatshirt, and he gasps when he understands what’s happening.

“appa?” he whimpers, tugging at young dad’s jeans. “appa?”

mom reaches out to rub youngjae’s left ear, gesturing at him to wait with a pretty smile. youngjae pouts but he nods and moves to cling to mom’s waist, closing his eyes, blocking the world.

young dad recovers much, much later with a sigh. and a wet sniff. he uses the bumps of his palms to roughly rub his eyes. they’re red when young dad glances at him, but his smile is making his reddened eyes disappear into thin slits so youngjae smiles back and climbs to his lap.

young dad presses a long kiss to the top of youngjae’s head and asks, _“still want to ride viking?”_

“yes!” youngjae shouts, adding extra aegyo to his korean answer.

_“that’s my son.”_ young dad grins and carries him like a sack of rice on his left shoulder, mom following behind them with their stuffs, smiling prettily like always.

 

▼

 

“ _miss you, i really miss you_  
geuraedo simsimhaji anke nae norael bulleojulge  
_turn the radio o-o-on  
turn the radio o-o-on_

_miss you, i really miss you_  
nega nal saenggakhal su itge nae norael bulleojulge  
_turn the radio o-o-on  
turn the radio o-o-on  
cuz i wanna be…”_

“what a beautiful voice you have, kid.”

youngjae blinks. he stops singing the song he loves the most from mom’s CDs and turns to the baritone voice greeting him from the front door. a handsome adult wearing black from head to toe is grinning at him as he takes off his black shoes.

“who are you tho? this is jb-hyung’s apartment, right?” youngjae thinks this adult is speaking way too fast. his korean sounds weird, like, youngjae-weird. not fluent. “oh that’s the one i’m looking for. so he’s been hiding from us here. is he sleeping?”

youngjae follows the adult’s finger pointing at mom, and he shrugs because he doesn’t understand the question.

the adult frowns.

“where’s jb-hyung?” he tiptoes to get inside, and sits down in front of youngjae. he’s really handsome. his eyes are big and he smells like the ocean.

youngjae understands that question. his answer is in english, _“out. dancing with his crew.”_ and the adult makes a comical face.

_“you speak english?”_ he switches to english easily and youngjae smiles. _“cool! i’m jackson, jb-hyung and jinyoung’s friends. who are you, sweet cheeks?”_

“im youngjae.” youngjae is suddenly feeling shy. sweet cheeks? that’s new. _“can i call you jackson?”_

_“of course, baby pea.”_ jackson bops the tip of youngjae’s nose and youngjae giggles. baby pea? no one has ever called youngjae baby pea before!

jackson grins. _“are you lost or something? why are you here?”_

youngjae shakes his head, putting his tiny hands to his warm cheeks. _“i’m not lost.”_

_“no? okay. where you from? the states?”_

_“no. auckland.”_

_“new zealand? awesome!”_ jackson then looks at youngjae funnily. youngjae pouts. he hasn’t showered and he had cereal for breakfast. does he have eye-booger or milk-mustache? why is jackson looking at him funnily?

jackson claps his hands and mom, who was home so late last night he fell asleep on the living room fully dressed, groans in his sleep (thankfully he’s not awake). jackson grimaces handsomely, and whispers, _“you know what? now that i take a good look at you, you kinda look like jb-hyung. it’s the eye-centered mole. are you his nephew?”_

youngjae’s heard young dad and mom lie about who he is to strangers. but jackson is not a stranger, is he? he said he’s young dad and mom’s friend. he could enter young dad’s password protected house! should youngjae tell jackson the truth? should he lie to jackson? but youngjae doesn’t want to lie to jackson because jackson calls youngjae sweet cheeks and baby pea!

“im youngjae,” youngjae answers, pointing at himself. “im youngjae.”

_“im youngjae? jb-hyung’s nephew, then. make sense.”_ jackson grins. _“what were you doing? have you eaten?”_

youngjae shakes his head. he was waiting for mom to wake up to cook him something for lunch. mom’s fried rice is the best.

“tsk, tsk. jb-hyung is so irresponsible.” jackson scoffs in korean. _“i happen to be hungry as well. just landed from hong kong, my hometown. do you want burger king? i’ll let you have ice cream after, how about that?”_

youngjae perks up at the mention of burger king and ice cream. and he wants to talk to jackson more.

“let’s go!” youngjae gets to his feet and drapes himself over jackson’s back. _“piggyback me, jackson!”_

“okay okay!” jackson lifts him up and asks where his jacket is. they go to young dad’s bedroom and jackson helps youngjae wearing his miniature bomber jacket and ducky socks. he piggybacks youngjae all the way to burger king two blocks from young dad’s house, and he fulfills his promise as he lets youngjae picks the ice cream he likes at 7-11. jackson takes him to a park to enjoy their ice creams where there are lots of kids around youngjae’s age playing on the playground. it’s sunday. the weather is warm and nice.

_“is this a date?”_ youngjae blurts out.

_“what?”_ jackson laughs/chokes. he needs a minute to answer, _“do you want it to be? because yea, sure, youngjae-yah, it’s a date.”_ and he sounds so genuine he’s making youngjae blush.

_“awww, look who’s having a crush on me!”_ jackson coos at him, pinching his nose. _“i’m so flattered! what do you want to do next, youngjae-yah?”_

youngjae wants to run and hide. he thought he wanted to marry miss gallagher but jackson is too awesome! i’m sorry miss gallagher!

_“i dunno...”_ youngjae whines.

_“if we’re talking about a date, we should go to the arcade. i will win you a plushie. wait wait, we should take sticker photos, i saw a box near here!”_

_“sticker photos?”_

_“you’ll like it. it’s so cute.”_ jackson nudges youngjae’s shoulders until youngjae falls to his side. instead of helping him to get up, jackson just laughs at him. _“come on!”_

time flies when youngjae is on a date (gosh!) with jackson, because it’s already dark by the time they get out of the arcade, youngjae hugging a cat and a bunny plushie while burying his face in blue colored cotton candy. it’s past dinner time, but jackson said they should go home first because his phone’s battery is dead and he couldn’t call both young dad or mom. he said he’s got a hunch that he will get yelled at for taking youngjae out on a date without telling any of them.

true to his words enough, jackson gets a yelling _and_ a hard slap to his handsome face from mom when they’re home. youngjae is about to protest because jackson has done nothing wrong, but then he sees mom is crying and youngjae doesn’t know why but he’s crying too.

_“mom? mom please don’t cry,”_ youngjae whispers, kneeling down to get closer to mom’s pitiful looking bundle on the floor. youngjae is so sad that he made mom worried about him.

_“did you just call him ‘mom’?”_ jackson repeats, his voice is losing the playful tone youngjae has always heard throughout their date. he’s still standing by the opened front door, a visible handprint on his left cheek. _“what the fuck?”_

it’s as if mom is triggered by jackson’s bad f word because he pulls youngjae to his arms, stands up, and he sounds so _unkind_ when he hisses,

“go away, jackson-ah.” and then he stomps off to young dad’s bedroom, locking it, slumping against the bed with youngjae situated on his lap.

_“m-mom? that’s jackson. youngjae was just playing with him, it’s okay.”_ youngjae sobs, because he’s also sad that mom slapped jackson.

_“it’s not okay!”_ mom snaps weakly, and youngjae understands that he deserves it so he just cries quietly to mom’s chest.

outside, jackson is rattling the door handle. he bangs the door when he can’t open it. “hey! hey, that’s not fair! jinyoung-ah, talk to me!” he calls out in korean. “what is happening, jinyoung-ah? isn’t youngjae jb-hyung’s nephew? why did he call you mom?”

mom keeps his mouth shut.

“jinyoung-ah!”

“yah, i’m not mad or whatever, okay? just talk to me.”

“is youngjae really your son? he’s so big, he’s like five. you’re like, you’re _nineteen,_ right? no way you had him when you were fourteen, goddammit, talk to me!”

“jinyoung-ah!”

“jackson-ah?” youngjae and mom gasp simultaneously at the sound of young dad’s terse voice. “what are you doing here?” there’s another rattling on the door handle. “jinyoung-ah? are you in there? is youngjae with you?”

“appa!” youngjae jumps off mom’s lap and unlocks the door. he meets young dad’s already opened arms and the tears are coming again as young dad holds him tight. jackson is just standing there rooted to the spot, looking back and forth to young appa and mom like they’re aliens from outer space.

 

▼

 

they talk it over dinner, which is a big serving of pizza and fried chicken and cola. mom’s eyes are swollen and he looks pale and he’s still not talking to jackson; he clings to young dad while making sure youngjae eats properly.

young dad looks more tired than usual. jackson is just making dumb faces during young dad’s explanation.

“jesus, that’s a lot to take in,” jackson phews, taking off his black snapback and wiping his sweaty temple. “not jinyoungie falling for you, jb-hyung, that one is too obvious, but youngjae coming from the future! whoa! what the hell. lemme see the photo you’re talking about. i’m still hoping this is just a dream, y’know?”

“what was that?” youngjae pouts when he hears mom snap again, in korean this time. they’ve been having the talk in korean, and youngjae who doesn’t understand a thing is getting sleepy after such hearty dinner.

“what?” jackson drinks his cola noisily.

“who else knows about my feeling for jaebum-hyung?” mom sits up straighter, but youngjae sees how tight his clutch is on young dad’s forearm.

“i recall exchanging knowing look with mark a couple of times,” jackson says, his baritone voice is like a lullaby to youngjae. “but we never talked about it. i mean, it’s yours, jinyoungie, what can we do about your feeling?” he pauses. “bambam and yugyeom... nope. i don’t think they know. too busy flirting with girl groups, i bet.”

mom nods, putting his head back to young dad’s right shoulder.

“i won’t tell a soul.”

“i know you won’t, jackson-ah. thank you.”

“anything for you, bro. jb-hyung? you got anything to say?”

“like what?”

“you tell me.”

“i haven’t fucked jinyoung yet.”

“gross! there’s a child on your lap! my god, you’re going to make jinyoung cry again.”

“then stop with your nonsense.”

jackson huffs, but he moves his focus to youngjae, who’s nodding off, head lolled up and down uncontrollably. youngjae is fast asleep by now.

“and how will youngjae go back to the future? did he come in a time machine, jb-hyung?”

“jinyoung thought we should reenact the photo on the designed date, and wait for what’s going to happen on that day.”

“where’s the photo? i asked to see it, ugh.”

“here, don’t sulk. you’re not cute.”

“whatever. oh, wow. whoa. it really is—was?—will be taken on may first. when’s may first anyway? shit, next friday? can i come over to say goodbye to youngjae? i think i might be his first love, after all.”

“what the hell? i’m not going to allow that.”

“yah, jb-hyung, i’m so insulted right now. he asked if we were on a date this afternoon, i swear! yah. _yah,_ don’t glare at me, park jinyoung!”

“stop screaming, my son is sleeping.”

 

 

 

 

_**4** _

jackson is only nineteen. sure he sings about love and whatnots, but he himself hasn’t been in love with anyone. there’s a dating ban from JYP entertainment artist contract, and to be honest jackson thinks he doesn’t need to be in a relationship to fall in love with someone. look at jinyoung. he’s in love with jb-hyung but they don’t put a label on what they have now and they’re happy.

_“ready, guys?”_ he holds out the photo on an arm length. _“youngjae-yah, don’t forget to scrunch your nose, okay?_ jb-hyung, get closer to jinyoung.”

“here?”

“yea. now put your arm around jinyoung’s waist,” jackson feels like teasing his friends so he adds, “don’t be shy.”

“shut the fu—”

jinyoung interrupts jb-hyung’s curse with a cheerful, “hyung, language.” and jb-hyung hilariously obeys like a very obedient husband he secretly is.

_“dad, smile!”_ youngjae says, and jackson presses the shutter button.

 

 

 

 

_**bonus: christmas eve 2017** _

jaebum is close, jinyoung has been on the receiving end way too many times he’s restoring the stutter of jaebum’s hips and jaebum’s louder growls on the back of his mind so he can move automatically in sync with jaebum.

jinyoung always feels like he’s on top of the world when jaebum comes, knowing that he’s the one providing for jaebum’s carnal needs.

when jaebum is pulling out of him, slowly, taking his time, jinyoung twists the bed sheet tighter, biting his bottom lip, savoring the last inch of jaebum’s cock in him.

he doesn’t expect jaebum’s panicked, “oh fuck. shit. fuck. _fuck._ ” though.

jinyoung uses his elbows to hold his weight, peering at the older man through the darkness. “w-what’s wrong, hyung?”

jaebum grits his teeth. “the condom broke,” he says, and jinyoung can hear the blood rushing in his ears. “fuck. did you—did you take your pills this month?”

“yes,” jinyoung puts a hand to his left chest, feeling his loud and frantic heart beats. he closes his eyes. “oh my god, jaebum-hyung, you scared me.”

“sorry.” jaebum chuckles from somewhere above him, and then they’re kissing rather obscenely like they didn’t just have two rounds of weekend sex. jaebum bites jinyoung’s chin before he jumps off of the bed. “shower?”

“later.” jinyoung opens his eyes to jaebum’s naked back, smiling at the angry, red lines adorning jaebum’s skin. “you go first.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
